All-or-Nothing Thinking
Seeing things in extremes: perfect or failure, good or bad, success or disaster.
I messed up one part, so the whole thing is ruined.
Open the breakdownBrain spirals
Cognitive Distortions
When your mind adds drama and forgets to cite sources.
Cognitive distortions are biased thinking patterns. Everyone has them sometimes; they become expensive when they start running the meeting. This guide helps name the pattern without turning self-awareness into a second unpaid job.
Overgeneralization
Taking one bad event and turning it into a permanent rule.
This went badly, so nothing ever works out for me.
Open the breakdownMental Filtering
Focusing only on the negative and ignoring the positive.
Ten people compliment you, one person criticizes you, and your brain builds a shrine to the criticism.
Open the breakdownDiscounting the Positive
Rejecting good things as if they do not count.
They only liked my work because they were being nice.
Open the breakdownJumping to Conclusions
Assuming you know something without enough evidence.
I know this is going badly, even though nobody has said that.
Open the breakdownMind Reading
Assuming you know what someone else thinks.
She did not text back, so she must be mad at me.
Open the breakdownFortune Telling
Predicting the future as if anxiety has a crystal ball.
This is going to be a disaster.
Open the breakdownCatastrophizing
Turning a possible problem into the worst possible outcome.
If I make a mistake in this meeting, I will lose the client, my career, my house, and possibly my will to own pants.
Open the breakdownMagnification
Blowing problems, flaws, or risks out of proportion.
This typo makes me look completely incompetent.
Open the breakdownMinimization
Shrinking your strengths, wins, or progress.
It was not a big deal that I handled all of that.
Open the breakdownEmotional Reasoning
Assuming something is true because it feels true.
I feel overwhelmed, so I must be failing.
Open the breakdownShould Statements
Using rigid rules against yourself or others: should, must, have to, supposed to.
I should be able to handle this without help.
Open the breakdownLabeling
Turning a mistake or trait into an identity.
I forgot that deadline, so I am a failure.
Open the breakdownMislabeling
Using exaggerated, emotionally loaded labels.
That conversation was a total humiliation.
Open the breakdownPersonalization
Assuming something is your fault when it may not be.
Everyone seems quiet today. I must have done something wrong.
Open the breakdownBlame
Putting all responsibility on yourself or someone else instead of looking at the full situation.
This is entirely my fault, or this is entirely their fault.
Open the breakdownControl Fallacies
Distorted beliefs about how much control you have.
Either I can control nothing, or I am responsible for everything. Neat little trap. Terrible floor plan.
Open the breakdownExternal Control Fallacy
Believing you have no control and everything just happens to you.
There is nothing I can do.
Open the breakdownInternal Control Fallacy
Believing you are responsible for everything and everyone.
If they are upset, I must fix it.
Open the breakdownFairness Fallacy
Expecting life or people to be fair according to your internal rulebook.
I work harder, so things should go my way.
Open the breakdownFallacy of Change
Believing you can only be okay if someone else changes.
I will be happy once they finally act differently.
Open the breakdownAlways Being Right
Feeling like being wrong is unsafe, humiliating, or unacceptable.
I cannot back down because then I will look weak.
Open the breakdownHeaven's Reward Fallacy
Believing that sacrifice, suffering, or hard work should automatically be rewarded.
I gave everything, so I should be appreciated.
Open the breakdownComparison Distortion
Measuring yourself against others in a way that ignores context.
She is doing better than me, so I am behind.
Open the breakdownNegative Prediction Bias
Assuming the most likely outcome is bad.
There is no way this will work.
Open the breakdownConfirmation Bias Thinking
Only noticing information that supports your existing fear or belief.
I knew they did not like me, while ignoring all the signs that they do.
Open the breakdownBlack-and-White Self-Worth
Treating your value as something that rises and falls based on performance.
If I am not productive today, I am useless.
Open the breakdownWhat If Spiraling
Chasing every possible bad scenario until your mind has built a disaster diorama.
What if this happens? Then what if that happens? Then what if everything collapses?
Open the breakdownUnrealistic Expectations
Holding yourself or others to standards that are not humane, practical, or sustainable.
I should be calm, organized, attractive, financially optimized, emotionally available, and caught up on laundry at all times.
Open the breakdownRegret Orientation
Mentally living in what you should have done instead of what can be done now.
I should have known better, repeated until it becomes background music.
Open the breakdownScarcity Thinking
Assuming there is never enough time, money, opportunity, help, or room to recover.
If I miss this chance, I will never get another one.
Open the breakdownCore Belief Filtering
Interpreting everything through an old belief about yourself.
If your core belief is "I am not enough," even neutral feedback can feel like proof.
Open the breakdownQuestions worth asking
Use the label, then check the room.
Labels are handles, not verdicts. The point is to slow the pattern down enough to choose a grounded next move.
- What are the facts I can actually observe?
- What story did my mind add?
- What would I say to a friend with the same evidence?
- What tiny next action creates more information?